We watched Pinocchio on Blu-ray last night – and it is amazing that it retains its G rating in today’s oversensitive society that we’re in.  Things that happen in the movie:

  • Animal Abuse – Geppetto kicks the cat (Figaro) with a WOODEN PUPPET. Not nice.
  • Child Abuse – one of the clocks in Geppetto’s house depicts a woman spanking a child on his bare ass.
  • Playing with Fire – Pinocchio plays with fire and starts his finger on fire!
  • Smoking – Everyone smokes a puff… even Pinocchio with a big ol’ stogie. (Bonus – there’s even chewing tobacco in Pleasure Island!)
  • Racial Profiling – the Italian puppeteer’s name is Stomboli. Seriously?!
  • Whoring Around – Have you ever noticed that Jiminy Cricket hits on EVERY woman character in Geppetto’s clocks?  (Why is late on his first day of work as Pinnochio’s conscience? He runs the next morning to catch up with Pinnochio while getting dressed… what was he doing that he had to be UNDRESSED? Think about it.)
  • Human Trafficking – The Coachman wants Honest John to collect “little boys” for him.  Oh.  Em.  Gee.
  • Vandalism – Kids throwing bricks through windows for fun.
  • Underage Drinking – While in Pleasure Island, Pinocchio has obviously drained the stein of booze in front of him.
  • Language – Jiminy uses the phrase “jack ass” in a G-rated movie.  So do other characters.